Why “Thank You” Sucks

My summer has been consumed by cover letters.

Going to grad school is a scary thing not just because of the course work but also because it costs a butt-load of money.

And for the record, I’m not just censoring myself. A butt is actually a real measurement. Oh the fun things you learn reading 18th century recipes…

Anyway, I’ve been desperately trying to find a paying job (preferably a graduate assistantship) so I don’t end up living in a whorehouse after I graduate with a sexvigintillion dollars in debt. And by that I don’t mean that prostitution is my alternative, it means that I’m moving back into my room… which looks like an Arabian whorehouse according to my friends. That’s what I get for a Midsummer Nights Dream meets Morocco theme…

But alas today I received another rejection letter. What I find weird is that any e-mail starting with “Thank you for applying” is something to dread. Every time I see it in any e-mail, an elephant sits on my chest. Even if it’s an order from Threadless.

Threadless:”Thank you for your…”

Me: “OH GOD WHY DOESN’T ANYBODY WANT ME?!?!”

Threadless: “… order. Your item will ship shortly.”

Me: “Oh. Well even if I don’t a job I still have a sweet ironic 80’s reference t-shirt!”

I’m gonna develop an ulcer from all my polite e-mails.

So it’s back to writing the same damn list of skill sets for each stupid cover letter, trying to highlight why I’m a “self-starter” and have a “strong command of the English language”.

Maybe I should just send them the link to my blog…

 

 

Side Note: Since I’ve been using a lot of weird measurements in my blog today, why not check out this page listing some unusual measurements. My favorite is the Mother Cow Index.

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